Dear Single lady,
Have you ever wondered if you are irreplaceable in people’s lives or if they are irreplaceable in your life? I found myself asking that question this morning.
Recently I woke up to see a missed call from my friend, and the normal thing to do is to return the call, exchange pleasantries and try to catch up on left-over conversations. But somehow, I lost interest in returning the call or starting a conversation, and I tried to figure out why because this is was someone who was dear to me. At that moment, I remembered days when I would tell him how irreplaceable he was and the best-est ever blah blah blah. Now am I being callous or could distance and lack of consistent communication, made the spark between us dwindle? I don’t know. Then I examined my current relationships and felt guilty that I had moved on from that relationship. So are people really replaceable?
The truth is people are not replaceable because everyone has a role they play in your life, and when they accomplish whatever they came for, they move or you move on. You see life is in phases. At a point, you were a baby, toddler, teenager, an adult, a mother and so on. At each of these stages, you met people who you learnt from, and they acted as pivots that propelled you to the next phase in life. For example, have you ever wondered why when you got to college, your friends in high school seemed not to be good enough, and you could not figure out why. Could it be because they lacked that elixir or maturity that you desired or needed, to carry you through the next phase in life?
As humans we are relational beings, we thrive on relationships and constant interaction, with God, people and the environment. Relationships can affect us either positively or negatively. They can influence our reaction to and perception of people and things around us. Even the great book, the bible tells you the impact of relationships:
1 Corinthians 15:33 Contemporary English Version (CEV)
33 Don’t fool yourselves. Bad friends will destroy you.
Basically what I mean is that for every phase in life, you need people that will help or nurture you through that phase and prepare you for a higher phase. That’s why we have mentor-mentee relationships and if the people you have in your life at that moment do not offer what you need, you will find yourself leaving that crowd, and gravitating to the crowd that have what you need. I am not saying you should abandon your old friends or relationships because they were there for you when the going was tough. (This is where you will need relational skills to handle all the people in your life). All I am saying is people are not replaceable, its either you moved on or they did because, like you they grew out of that phase and moved to a higher phase where you don’t have what they need. So stop looking back, move on, build new relationships and enjoy the stage you are.
Leave your comments below and tell me what you think.